


Loki's Mind

by LokiCode



Category: Thor (Movies)
Genre: Description of blood, Fandom, Feels, Harsh Odin, Loki returning to Asgard, M/M, My First Work in This Fandom, Punishment, Sentimental Frigga, Stubborn Thor, Whipping, angsty
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-03-15
Updated: 2014-04-29
Packaged: 2018-01-15 18:51:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 10,657
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1315543
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LokiCode/pseuds/LokiCode
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Story of Loki coming back to Asgard, the personal struggles he faces, and what lies ahead. No 'Thorki' until later chapters ( I think ) **No Thor 2 Spoilers** First Fan Fiction! Enjoy!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Going Back

**Chapter**

**Going** **Back**

  
Loki stood, looking at Thor as he had his back to him. He could feel the cold chains tight around his slender wrists. Thor was taking him to Asguard and there was nothing he could do about it. He didn't have the energy to fight anymore, he didn't have the strength to even talk for once, not that he could anyways, Thor had put a metal gag around his mouth so he could not talk back when he saw Hawkeye smile when the Black Widow whispered into his ear. He ignored them and looked up at the destruction that his army had caused. He smiled under the gag, they had a lot of cleaning up to do.

Thor picked up the Tesseract and handed the other end of it to Loki. He hesitated for a moment and gave Thor a unsure look but took the handle in his hand. Thor gave one last nod to the avengers and twisted the handle to activate the Tesseract.  
Loki felt the energy shoot up his body as he could feel himself being transported around the realms. He closed his eyes hoping that it would never end. But of course he opened his eye to Odin's stare and ten guards surrounding him, including Thor. He wished he could show them his devilish smile, how he loved to see such angry eyes, he knew he had caused trouble and grief for his not-family and he loved it.  
Odin looked at his son, long jet black messy hair, bags under his eyes, cuts and bruises on his face and neck.

"Bring him to the Throne room" Odin ordered, turning away from Loki.

Thor grabbed Loki's shoulder to lead him in but Loki shrugged his hand off and walked forward following Odin with guard still surrounding him. Loki could hear Thor sigh behind him as he walked.

As Loki walked into the room he winced when childhood memories came rushing into his troubled thoughts.

_"Try and catch me Loki!" Thor yelled behind him as they raced through the halls._

_"Slow down Thor! You know I am not as fast as you!" Loki whined_

_Thor laughed and stopped so his younger brother could catch up. When he did he was hunched over trying to catch his breath._

_"You need to devote some time to training brother" Thor chuckled._

_Loki looked up at him with a hint of disgust._

_"Magic is just as powerful as brute strength and speed, maybe even more so." He argued_

_"Oh really?" Thor smiled_

_"Yes really, and if you would listen-" Loki got the wind knocked out of him as Thor tackled him to the marble floor._

_"Ow!"_

_"You were saying?" Thor laughed and sat on Loki's chest proudly._

_Loki gave a half smile and shoved Thor off._

_"I wasn't ready!" Loki sat up._

_Thor gave a puppy dog smile and ran off again "Your it!"_

_Loki laughed "Thor!" Loki got up and ran after his brother._

Loki shook his head, what a horrible memory.

As Odin went and sat on his Throne. Loki stopped and stood in the middle of the room, noticing that everyone else was kneeling. He chuckled, Never again would he kneel to the king of Asguard. He looked up and made eye contacted with Odin, glaring at him with hate in his eyes.  
Everyone stood up and Odin started what seemed like sentencing Loki.

"Loki Odinson, you have murdered, betrayed, terrorized, and attacked Midguard and it's people. Before we continue is there anything you wish to say?"  
Loki's gag was removed but his wrists remained shackled. He rotated his sore jaw.

He looked back up at Odin and smiled.

"Does it hurt you to see me like this? Odin? Does it pain you to see what I have done and could have done to the mortals of Midguard? I see it in your eyes Odin. Whatever you do to me I am prepared for it. There is nothing more you can do to me." Loki hissed.

Odin was silent for a moment. Loki could feel Thor's stare cutting into the back of his head.

"Loki, until I come up with a punishment that suits your crimes you are to sleep, eat, and live in the darkest of our dungeons. In addition to that I cast a spell, for if you tell a lie your lips will be sewn shut, and there will be no food or water that will past your lips for several hours. Thor take him out" Odin declared.

Thor gave Loki a little shove and made him walk to the door. Loki wasn't worried, He was ready for this, he knew it was coming.

END of Chapter.

Alright I hope you guys like it. I love it so far Sorry it took me a bit to write I wanted to write a little more. Thank you for waiting!

Again sorry if there is spelling mistakes.  
-Loki Code


	2. Frustrations

Chapter 2

  
The walk to the dungeons felt long and unending. Loki could feel Thor's eyes on him the whole time.  
"What about you Thor? Does it hurt you to see me like this? Beaten and shackled." Loki gave a chuckle, not looking back as he walked

"You did this to yourself brother" Thor said, trying not to show concern on his face when Loki turned around.

"I am not your brother" Loki hissed

Thor fell silent not wanting to discuss the situation further.  
Loki looked around the hallway they were walking down. It was dark, damp, cobwebs everywhere, and rats scurrying along the ground searching for food.  
Finally they stopped at the last cell door on the left. Thor opened the cell door and led Loki in. He motioned the guards to remove Loki's armour, he didn't resist when the stripped his armour from his body. Loki's armour was like his skin and hated whenever someone touched it or took it but he knew he had to save his energy for and attempt to escape or to protect himself. Loki looked around as the guards left the cell with his belongings. Everything was all stone, there was nothing in the room except for a small barred window and some straw on the floor. Loki guessed it was a pitiful excuse for a bed.

"Cozy" Loki looked back at Thor and gave a small sarcastic smile.

Thor stayed silent and stood in the doorway of the cell looking at Loki sternly as he walked around his new living space.  
"I do not like you living down here brother. I will ask father to give you your old room back." Thor insisted.

Loki clenched his jaw when Thor again called him brother but decided to pretend he didn't hear it.  
"Ah... So it does bother you" Loki turned to Thor and chuckled. The chains on his wrists clinking together when he moved.

Thor glared angrily at his brother.

"Listen-" Thor started to speak.

"Leave" Loki said plainly

"Loki I-"

"Leave!" Loki shouted

"I am in no mood to talk right now. I want to be alone"

Thor clenched his fists, feeling his frustration rise.  
"You have been alone for far to long, I need answers Loki... Tell me why you do this? Why do you hate everything around you? Why do insist on ruling Midgard?" Thor blurted

Loki grinded his teeth together trying to remain calm. He just wanted to be alone right now. He wanted to restart from the beginning, to change everything that went wrong.

"Get out..." Loki said through his teeth.

Thor had so many questions for Loki but he knew he wasn't going to get them when Loki was in this mood. He turned his back to his brother and walked out punching the wall and making the room shake before he left and slamming the door behind him.

Loki let himself breath after Thor left. he looked around his cell again, looking down at the straw bed and shook his head. This is going to be a long night.

* * *

The beam of light from his tiny window shined into Loki's closed eyes. He raised his hand up to block it from blinding him and slowly opened his eyes. Annoyed at the sun he sat up and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. He let out a grunt when he felt his spine start to hurt from sleeping on the stone floor. It took him a minute to finally stand up, his hands still shackled. He stretched, raising his arms above his head and then back down to rub his sore back. At least he slept, that was his best sleep he had in months. There was a bang on his cell door that made his thoughts and body go on the defensive. The cell door opened and one of the guards came in with a silver tray. He walked in a bit and threw the tray to Loki's feet. Loki looked at the tray and then back at the guard.

"Breakfast" he mumbled and hobbled away, locking the cell door behind him.

Loki stared at the little ration of food on the tray. He ignored it. He was weary of what was in the food and half a mind just to shove it back under the door. He wondered what he will be up against today. Nothing could really compare what he has been through emotionally and physically.

Author's Note - Sorry this chapter was a little late. Life gets of these things. Hope you all enjoy it :) - Loki Code


	3. I Don't Need Your Help

Chapter 3 Fan-Fiction

Thor paced his room trying desperately to control his anger with Loki. He wanted to talk to him, to understand why, but was afraid he would only upset Loki more than he already was. He also wanted to talk to his father about Loki living in the dungeons, he knew what his brother had done, he had witnessed it first hand. Thor wanted to help his brother, to give him another chance. He just hoped that Odin was willing to give he another one as well. He need to tell Loki that his family still loved him and cared for him no matter what he had done. Thor stopped pacing and marched out of his room and turned in the direction of the Throne room.

Thor walked up to the large golden doors and took a deep breath in before opening them and walking in with his head held high. Odin was sitting in his chair and talking to Frigga who was sitting next to him. They turned in their chairs to look at Thor as he walked in and kneeled infront of them.

Thor then stood and looked up at them. "I wish to speak with you father, about Loki." Thor's voice was serious and stern.

"Speak your mind my son." Odin boomed

"I want you to put me in charge of Loki. I can help him, I do not like him living down in those dungeons." Odin paused.

"You want me to give you custody over Loki?" Odin said grooming his beard with his hand and looked over quickly at Frigga.

"I know what Loki has done is unforgivable, but I am willing to give him another chance, I want to help him but the only way I can is if I am in charge of him" Thor explained.

There was another long pause before Odin spoke.

"Very well Thor, I trust you. But if Loki does something to harm anyone there will be severe consequences" Odin warned

"I understand. Thank you" Thor nodded and then spun around and left the room. More determined than ever now, he would do everything in his power to help his brother. To help him be him again.

* * *

Loki yawned and played with his chains that had started biting into his wrists. His stomach growled but ignored it. He did not trust the food that had been given to him. Loki sighed and sat down on the straw in the corner of the cell, wincing when he hit his still sore back against the wall. He placed his head in his hands trying not to think anymore, He just wanted this to be over with.

Just then his cell door unlocked and Loki jumped up from his bed ready for anything. He rolled his eyes and relaxed his shoulders when he saw Thor walk in.

"What now Thor?" Loki hissed and sat back down.

"Odin has put me in charge of you. I was hoping you would be cooperative and walk with me to your chambers." Thor explained, leaning against the stone wall with his arms crossed looking at Loki.

Loki looked up at Thor and let out a small laugh. "Your joking right? Why would you want to be in charge of me? Why give me another chance? After all I have done?" Loki looked back down at his hands.

"This is no joke brother, I want to give you another chance because I know I can help you. Now are you coming or do I have to use force?" Thor had a serious look on his face.

Loki knew he was serious. "I am not your brother Thor" he said as he got up and walked over to Thor, his chains clinking together as he stood. He still had no energy to fight and he wouldn't have won against Thor's strength, plus he rather be in his old room than here.

Thor motioned his head for Loki to walk forward. Loki nodded and started to walk and Thor followed behind him. Loki was surprised at himself that he still knew his way around this place. They reached his room, Loki stopped and stood at the doors to his old room. Not noticing the two guards that stood on either side of the doorway. Thor nodded to the guards to open the door and Loki walked in. There was a glint of happiness in his eyes when he say all of his books that covered all the walls top to bottom, his old bed and desk with all of his notes. Thor noticed his brothers nostalgic moment.

"Everything is still in the same place. I didn't let anyone move or change anything" Thor assured him.

Loki nodded but said nothing as he walked over to one of his bookshelves and traces his fingers along the spines of the books.

"I'll let you get settled in, I will be back later with some food, you must be hungry." Thor said as he walked towards the door.

"I'm fine" Loki said sternly as he pulled out a book and flipped through it not looking back at Thor.

Thor shook his head but left the room locking it behind him. He had to take this slow and be patient, he had none of those traits but he would try. For Loki's sake.

Loki closed the book he had been flipping through and put it back onto the shelf. He turned and walked over to his desk and started to search through his old notes. Memories coming back of the days that he wrote them.  
He still couldn't believe that Odin let Thor take over like that. Thor is a fool and easy to manipulate. He hated having someone trying to control him especially Thor, he didn't need his help.  
Loki heard the door unlock and Frigga walked in.

"Loki... How are you" She asked as she walked towards him with open arms but stopped when Loki backed away, arms half raised.

"What's wrong?" Loki, I have missed you no matter what happened. I am glad to see my son is home"

"I am not your son Queen Frigga, this is not my home either." Loki was being polite, he had not as big of a grudge against her than he did Odin and Thor.

She was just following Odin's wishes. Frigga lowered her arms and intertwined her fingers together, clear sadness on her face.

"I am sorry you feel that way Loki, but I love you like I love Odin and Thor. To me you are my son no matter what.  
Loki blinked at her, swallowing sadness and frustration. He nodded and looked down at the floor.  
"I think Thor is on his way up. I suggested that you eat together"

"That was a very poor suggestion" Loki sighed and rubbed his forehead.

"Thor only wants to help-" She started

"I do not want his help!" he growled glaring at Frigga with his emerald cut eyes. He tried to calm himself a bit when he noticed he had frightened her and that she had taken a few steps backwards towards the door.

"Please Queen Frigga, I would like to be left alone." He said as politely as he could through his clenched teeth.  
She nodded and quickly left the room, tears in her eyes.

As soon as Loki heard the door lock he charged over to his desk and grabbed the ledge of it and flipped it with ease, releasing all his built up frustration. The desk landed upside down with papers flying everywhere. He kicked it back and it slammed into the wall. Loki started pacing back and fourth. 'Why don't they just kill him already?' He thought. After a few minutes of pacing he had stopped pacing and walked over to his bed and sat down. What was taking Odin so long to decide on his punishment? Thor being in charge of him felt like punishment but Loki knew that it wasn't meant to be. Was he trying to buy Thor some time? It wasn't going to work, Loki was sure of it.

Loki lied back down onto his bed, his head throbbing from thinking. He never thought that his bed was this comfortable until now. His eyes fluttered shut and he fell asleep.

Thor opened Loki's door and walked in with a golden tray that was filled with food. His eyes widened when he saw the mostly destroyed desk and all the papers lying around it. He looked over to Loki who was sleeping almost like he was dead, his chest was barely moving. Thor put the tray down on the small table that was in the corner of the room, then walked over to Loki.

"Loki" he whispered standing at his bedside. When he got no response he grabbed Loki's shoulders and shook him a bit.

"Loki" he said a bit louder.

Loki's eyes flew open and shoved Thor away.

"What are you doing?!" He shouted, still half asleep.

"Relax Loki, I was just making sure you were not dead. It looked like you were barely Breathing" Thor smirked  
Loki scowled at Thor and sat up.

"Well if your going to make that face then your wrists with stay shackled" he teased.

"If you think I am going to beg and say 'please' you are sorely mistaken"

Thor frowned and shrugged "Suit yourself. I have brought some food, Will you eat with me?" Thor walked over to the table and sat down in one of the chairs.

"I rather not but it looks like I have no choice." Loki said as he stood up and walked over to the table.

Loki sat down in the chair opposite to Thor and was overwhelmed by how much food there was.

"Is there anyone else joining us?" he joked but Thor didn't hear him, he was to busy stuffing a boar leg into his mouth.

Loki rolled his eyes and started picking at a loaf of bread. He wondered if the cooks and servants knew who the food was going to. Finally hunger pains won and Loki dug into some fruit.

Thor noticed and smiled feeling he had accomplished something big. He put down the boar leg that he had been chewing on and held out his hand.

"Give me you hand" Thor ordered

Loki just stared at him, leaning away from Thor's hand.

Thor smiled and held up the key to Loki's shackles in his other hand.

Still Loki stared, unsure what Thor wanted.

Thor grew tired of waiting so he reached over and grabbed Loki's wrist, yanking his brother towards him and began unlocking the cuffs.

Loki winced when fresh air hit his freed hand. His wrist was red and swollen,  
he tore his other hand away when Thor finished taking off his  
shackles, rubbing his wrists and glaring at him.

"Sorry, they were a bit tight. Should I send for a healer?" Thor felt a bit guilty.

"It's fine" Loki looking back down at his freed wrists.

Loki stood up and walked into the center of the room.

"What does Odin plan to do with me?" Loki asked.

Thor stared at Loki's back.

"I do not know. He has taken away your power to lie, so he must be wanting to ask you some questions."

Loki knew that Odin had put a spell on him when he first got here.  
He had been watching his words carefully since then.  
Thor leaned back in his chair wiping his mouth with a napkin.

"Listen Loki, I can help you if you would just let me."

"I do not need it. How can I be more clear?" Loki hissed still having his back to Thor.

"How can I be more clear that I am not giving up?" Thor was standing now with his arms crossed and taking a few steps towards his brother.

"Loki look at me, I'm talking to you" Thor ordered.

He didn't a response. He walked over and grabbed Loki by the shoulders and turning him around.

"Look at me Loki" He boomed.

Loki stood there emotionless, he stared at the floor refusing to look up.

"Let go" he almost whispered.

"Not until I get some answers Loki." He grabbed Loki's chin and forced his head up so he could look at him and then placed his hand on his brothers jaw to keep his face steady.

"Let go Thor! You are not getting any answers out of me, you don't deserve anything from me!" Loki tried to shove

Thor away but it felt like he was fighting a cement wall. Thor's grip tightened and his jaw clenched.

"After all you have done, all that you have destroyed, people you have murdered... Do you feel nothing brother?"

Loki stopped struggling for a moment and looked up at him "Would you not lash out after finding that your life was a entire lie? Would you not feel hate and overwhelmed that your so called parents were nothing but kidnappers telling you that they love you?" He glared at Thor, his eyes starting to water.

"We are your family Loki, I love you cause you are my brother. How many times must you make me say it?" Thor said sternly, not breaking eye contact.

"I don't want you to say it! Let go of me!" Loki started to struggle against Thor's almost painful grip.

Finally he had had enough. He started to murmur under his breath and before Thor new was he was saying he was thrown back against the wall by an invisible force. He fell down with a thud and was disoriented for a moment.

Thor quickly regained his thoughts and raised his hand to call for Mjölnir. It took only a blink of an eye and his hammer was in his hand.

"Enough of this Loki! I am growing tired of your games!" he shouted standing up.

"So soon? I was just starting to have a little fun!" Loki gave a small laugh.

"Come on then Odin's son, hit me! You with all your strength... You can't bring yourself to fight me! Your emotions make you weak!" Loki screamed.

Thor almost roared as charged Loki with his hammer pointing right for his opponents abdomen.

End chapter.

**Alright! Sorry for being late. There might be a few spelling mistakes but I was rushing to post it. I hope you like it! I will try to post the next chapter early. Feedback and comments are appreciated! -Loki Code/Edited - 10/5/13**


	4. Fight, Pain, Sleep

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still editing other chapters right now. Nothing is Beta'd at the moment.

Loki felt the air leave him when Thor hit him, making him fly backwards and hit the ground making him wince.

Thor stood over Loki "Do not try to stand up Loki, I will only strike you back down." he said with a hint of disappointment in his voice.

Loki laughed as he sat up, but all the came out was a cough. He gave a small smile, snapped his fingers and green flames erupted from his

hands. Thor glared and swung his hammer again, Loki jumped to the side before he could bring his hammer down on him. Loki flicked his wrist

and fire shot out and struck Thor in the side, making him stumble back and grab his ribs. Thor was livid now, he charged again this time grabbing

Loki and smashing him against the bookshelf then throwing him back onto the floor. Loki rolled across the floor but quickly got back onto his feet.

"Is that the best the God of Thunder can do?" Loki smiled.

"Enough of this!" Thor boomed and lunged towards Loki.

Thor tackled his brother and they both landed on the ground with a thud. Thor took Mjölnir and placed it on Loki's chest.

"I am losing patience with you brother. Let me in. I can help."

"I am not your brother!" Loki screamed and thrashed around in a attempt to try and get free.

Thor looked at Loki feeling guilt and pity for him.

Loki glared back at Thor eyes full of rage and hate.

There was silence for a few moments.

Loki rested his head back onto the ground and sighed.

"All those years acting like brothers, it was fun I must admit but it ended when you were banished. I found out who... what I was... And while you where down on midguard Odin went into one of his so called sleeps I got to finally do what I was born to do. Rule. I wanted to prove myself and finally I had the chance, until you came back..." tears welled up into his eyes but he closed them tightly desperately trying not to show so much vulnerability to his opponent.

Thor crossed his arms and leaned against one of the posts on the edge of Loki's bed.

Loki turned his head away from Thor, not wanting to even look at him. "You had to come back... Why couldn't you stay there with your midgardian whore... I am sure you would both like that. Why bother with me? I could have done it, I could have taken care of Asgard." Loki was trembling with anger, wanting to desperately strike Thor to do anything to hurt him further. He wanted him to feel pain, the same pain he felt.

"You have no right to talk about her Loki" Thor had a threatening tone his voice.

Loki looked at him "Why not? I am speaking the truth. I thought you wanted to here it?" he scoffed

"Yes... but focus on the issue at hand"

"And you think I am going to listen to you?" Loki snapped.

There was a pause, The two just stared at each other. Thor didn't know what else to say or do. What could he do?

Loki squinted his eyes when Thor didn't respond.

"Now get this off of me" he hissed through his teeth and began to struggle against the weight of Thor's weapon

Thor just stood there not knowing what else to say. Then it hit him. "I love you, Brother" he said with a lot more 'lust' than he intended.

Loki stopped struggling instantly and focused his gaze back to Thor. His lip twitched. "I hate you"

As soon as those words left his lips he felt this unbearable pain in his lips. Tears came back to his eyes and started to flow down his face.

Thor's eyes widened and panicked, he called Mjölnir back to his hand, releasing his brother.

Loki sat up and wrapped his arms around himself, clutching his sides and digging his nails into his shirt. Trying to distract himself from the pain.

Thor's breathing hitched up, he went over and kneel next to him.

"What can I do?" he asked as he put his hand on Loki's shoulder.

Loki looked up at Thor tear's stained his face but he still glared at Thor, then to the hand on his shoulder, he pushed it off and shuffled away until he hit the wall of the room.

Thor took his hand back and stayed at Loki's level. "I'm so sorry, Loki"

Loki shook his head and closed his eyes, he could taste the blood and copper in his mouth. He mentally scolded himself for not watching his words. Why now? He knew he hated Thor... This shouldn't have happened.

He gently reached up and traced the enchanted threads that sewn his lips together and winced when he pressed a bit to hard.

Thor stood up and went to the grand bathroom, that was attached to Loki's room and came back with some towels, he knelt back down closer to Loki and offered him one.

He snatched the towel out of his hands and glared at Thor as he softly pressed the cloth to his lips. He could feel the blood dribble down his chin and neck. He noticed that Thor was uncomfortable close to him, he nudged away to get more breathing room.

Thor watched Loki nudge away from him, he frowned but he reached over with another towel and started to wipe Loki's neck.

Loki flinched and tried to push Thor off and get more distance between them, but Thor grabbed his wrist.

"Let me." Thor growled.

Loki stared at him, but then relaxed a bit and nodded.

Thor smiled a bit, feeling he had won a battle. He let Loki's wrist go and continued.

Loki leaned his head back against the wall, still holding the towel to his mouth.

They sat there in silence as Thor wiped the blood off Loki's neck.

The blood had slowed but Loki was still in a lot of pain.

Thor had finished wiping his neck and threw the towel to the side and looked at Loki and then to his bed.

"We should get you off the floor" he said as he stood up and offered his hand out to him.

Loki waved his hand away and attempted to get up, leaning on the wall for support. His knees felt shaky and unstable. 'They are just strings...' he thought 'Odin probably did something else to make him feel this weak and drowsy...'Bastard'.

He was finally able to stand up on his two feet. He tried to walk forward but stumbled, Thor caught him and helped him straighten back up. He pushed back against Thor but he had a firm hold on him. 'Fine' he thought. He nodded to Thor and he helped him towards his bed.

He sat down and layed back, he let out a sigh through his nose and looked up at the ceiling.

"Loki..." Thor called him but Loki ignored him and continued to look at the ceiling.

"Loki" said again, a little for harshly.

Loki could suddenly feel Thor roll up his shirt, his eyes widened and he looked up at Thor, shoving his hands away.

"Relax... Your shirt is bloody..." Thor continued to take off Loki's shirt.

'I can do it myself!' He yelled in his head as he struggled against Thor.

Thor managed to take Loki's shirt off and he threw it to the floor.

Loki shuffled back on the bed away from Thor and glared at him, he jerked his head to the door, telling him to leave.

Thor sighed and looked at him. "I cannot leave you like this, I'm going to stay"

Loki fumed and shook his head then pointed to the door.

He chuckled a bit "I told you... I'm staying... Here get into bed."

Loki groaned but crawled under the covers of his bed, the sheets felt amazing on his pale marked skin.

Thor came around to the other side, climbed in next to Loki and sat on top of the covers.

He looked at Loki as he turned his back to him and tried to sleep.

He sighed and leaned back against the head board.

'Tomorrow will be better' he thought to himself. 'It has to be'


	5. Visions and Sentiment

Chapter 5: Visions and Sentiment

"You have failed us Asgardian, we told you what would happened if the tesseract was not returned to us."

Loki shivered and attempted to speak but his lips wouldn't open. He heard the chitari laugh at his struggle to speak, everything was dark and cold. He looked down at himself and saw he had nothing on except his leggings.

"When we find you, there will be no mercy, death will not be quick no matter how much you beg, we will take our time with you..." the voice was gravely and echoing.

He shivered again as he felt the creatures breath against his neck. Loki turned suddenly only to receive a blow to the jaw. He fell to the floor cutting his hands and arms on the cold stone. The creature leaned over him pinning him down by his throat. All Loki could do was wriggle underneath the pressure, still attempting to speak.

"We will get you. " the Chitari hissed, smiling as he lifted Loki up by his throat and throwing him to the ground again.

Loki jolted awake and stared up at the ceiling for a few moments. Still trying to bring his heart rate back down, he sat up, his eyes frantically scanning the room. He swore when the pain in his jaw caught up with him, the strings were gone but his mouth still throbbed. Looking over to the empty side of the bed he scoffed at himself for expecting Thor to be there and feeling a sliver of disappointment when he wasn't. Loki shook his head and threw the covers off, standing up on his wobbly legs and making his way to the bathroom.

Loki made it to the sink and splashed some water in his face, looking up into the mirror he started to examine the cuts and bruises on his body and face. He was somehow paler than usual, cuts on his back and chest were already starting to heal, he seemed to have lost a bit of weight as well. He leaned closer to inspect the newly punctured holes around his mouth, he flinched as the face of the Chitari flashed in his find. He leaned on the sink and breathed in and shivered, gripping the edge tightly. He let out a roar as he punched the mirror, glass shattered onto the floor and he cringed at his cut up hand. He swore again, grabbing another towel and applying pressure to the injury. He finally let out the breathe he forgot he had been holding he shook his head again and then shrugged 'What's another scar or two?' he thought. Loki looked at his hand and decided that the cuts weren't that deep, he found some cloth that he could use. He left the mirror shards on the floor, only brushing them gently with his foot back under the sink. He didn't need anymore of Thor's pity if he found out. He sighed as he stripped the rest of his clothing and prepared for a hot bath.

Thor was in the kitchen putting fruit and bread into a tray, his mind still focused on last night. He could still hear Loki's voice in the back of his head 'I Hate You'. Loki had lied, he smiled a bit at that. Finally some progress. He knew Loki would never be the same as he had remembered but at least he could help him become more... 'Stable'. He placed and apple on the pile of food and started heading up to Loki's chamber's tray in hand.

Thor reached the door and one of the guards opened the door for him. He walked in and placed the tray on Loki's unmade bed. He heard the bathe running and sighed, at least he had more time to prepare himself to face his brother. Hand's on his hips he looked around the room, and found the sad looking half broken table lying there with papers all around. He walked over and looked down at the papers, one caught his eye. He picked it up, it was a drawing, a drawing of him. He smiled as he studied it more before stuffing into a spot in his armour. He laughed a bit and started cleaning up the rest of the papers, picking up the table and attempting to put it back in place.

Loki had just gotten out of the shower and was drying himself off. He had closed his eyes and forced himself not to look towards the mirror again. He heard rustling outside the door, opening his eyes and sighing "Thor" his said to himself. Rolling his eyes and wrapping a towel around his waist, he took a deep breath and opened the door.

Thor heard the bathroom door open and he looked over to see a almost naked Loki. His eye's scanned his brother's body looking at the cuts and bruises, finding the new bandage on his brothers hand. He looked back up to Loki's face that was almost emotionless.

"Morning" Thor cleared his throat and looked back to the table but giving up and walking over to the tray of food he had brought up.

"Breakfast?" he asked and held out an apple.

Loki shook his head no and went over to his wardrobe to change.

Thor frowned and bit into the apple as he sat down on the bed watching him. Thor had noticed Loki had lost quite a bit of weight since the biofrost was destroyed. He could still remember his brother's face as they hung from the bridge by the scepter. The moment when Odin said 'No, Loki' and Loki's pained face had gone expressionless. The moment when he had let go and fell into the abyss, and then the moment when Thor had found out he was alive and on Midgard, he was angry but also relieved. He sighed and took another bite of the apple.

Loki could feel Thor's eyes on him as he looked through his clothes. He had picked out a green tunic with a gold border on the neck line, plus some black leggings and leather boots. He went back into the bathroom, not wanting Thor to gawk at him the entire time.

When he came back out he found Thor making his bed.

"Doing the servant's job's now, are we?" He jabbed

Thor didn't look up "I said I would help you in anyway I could. Besides no one is aloud in hear but Fath-... Odin, Frigga and I." he caught that last part just in time.

Loki shrugged "So what now?"

"I'm not sure. Odin is still thinking your punishment over." Thor replied

He sighed and crossed his arms "Is it really that difficult to sentence a frost giant to his fate?"

Thor glared at him "Even I know you don't think you fall into the group as them, Odin still thinks of you as his son and you my brother."

Loki walked swiftly over to him and stopped only inches away from his face. He met Thor's glare with his own and jabbed his finger's at Thor's forehead with his two fingers.

"Get it through that thick skull of your's that I was never or ever will be your brother" He pushed Thor's head back and brushed past him towards the door.

"Now would you kindly get out." Loki gave a fake smile and waved to the door.

Thor just stared at him, jaw clenched. It was taking all his willpower not to go over and knock Loki out. It's wouldn't help anything but it would be pretty satisfying at the moment. Then his mind flashed back to last night.

"Last night... you lied" he began.

Loki tensed "Thor, just don't." he warned.

"You don't hate me." Thor smiled and crossed his arms. "So what do you feel for me Loki?" he asked as he started walking up to him.

Loki lowered his hand and started fidgeting and biting his lip. "Don't push me, Thor." He hissed through clenched teeth.

Thor was standing at his side now facing him. "You will have to answer eventually, Loki. I won't push you right now after what you went through last night."

Loki snapped his head towards him, glaring. "I don't have to tell you anything. Now get out." he snapped.

Thor uncrossed his arms "Fine." he huffed. He swung the door open and it smashed against the wall as he left, leaving the guard to close it when stomped down the corridor.

Loki stood there focusing on keeping his breathing under control. He laughed to himself and how ridiculous this all was, at least to him it was. He sighed, grabbed an old book from the ground and began reading. Doesn't matter what book it is as long it will take his mind away from here.

* * *

"Thor!"

Thor stopped and turned to the voice, it was Sif.

"Not now, Sif. I am not in the mood to talk right now"

"You brought Loki back I hear. How is the going for you?"

Thor said nothing and looked at the floor.

"That bad huh? I knew he was no good. Why bother, Thor? He has already tried to kill you... On several occasions." she crossed he arms and shook her head.

Thor sighed and gave a sad smile. "Thank you, Sif but you do not need to worry. I will talk to you later" he turned and started to walk away.

She caught his arm "Give him up on him, Thor. He is a waste of space and your time."

He brushed her hand off and kept walking, ignoring her calling after him.

* * *

Thor found himself in the Throne room looking up at his Father who was deep in thought.

Thor cleared his throat and shuffled his feet.

Odin looked up, seeming to just notice him.

"What is it, Thor?"

"Sorry to disrupt you. I was just wondering if you came to terms about Loki?"

Odin stayed silent for a few moments.

Thor felt a tinge of panic in those moments. 'Could Odin possibly execute Loki? No... He would not... Would he?'

Finally Odin spoke. "If I did not think of Loki as my son I would have had him killed as soon as he stepped foot on Asgard, but you have to know that I can't leave him be without punishment."

Thor's brow furrowed "Loki's mouth was sewn shut for several hours, his body is already cut and bruised, he believes he has no family. He's just so guarded now. I try to talk to him but it always end's in a fight. His mind... I don't know what he thinks about but it's dark and sad. He already suffers, what more could happen to him?"

"So he has already lied..."

"Yes but-"

"Did you not see what he has done, Thor?" Odin cut him off.

"I have!" Thor boomed back "I have seen it first hand. He need's the help, I know what I'm doing"

"Do you think that I do not know what I am doing? Do you think I am not trying other ways to help him?" Odin stood and glared down at Thor.

"Punishing him will not help him." Thor snapped

I am still thinking of all the options but I can not show Loki special treatment. You can not change my mind about it, Thor." Odin growled.

He sighed and looked down "Do what you must."

Odin gave a sharp nod and sat back down.

Silence filled the room.

Thor couldn't stand the tention anymore and turned to leave.

"It will be soon, Thor-" Thor turned back to his father." I will decide soon." Odin repeated.

Thor gave a small nod and looked down, "I understand." was all he said and he left the room.

As he left he found Fandral and Volstagg walking down the hallway.

Thor smiled "My friends! How are you?" he yelled after them.

"Ah! My prince! Welcome back! Me and Volstagg were just wondering when you would show yourself. We are fine thank you. I hope you fair the same?" Frandral yelled back

Thor jogged up to them. "I have been better but thank you" he said, patting Frandral's shoulder.

Volstagg shifted a bit. "We also hear Loki is back." he said his voice wavering.

Thor's smile faltered "Yes, well... He is back but... I do not wish to talk about it. I apologize but it is difficult to talk about."

"We understand" Frandral quickly cut in.

Thor nodded, his smile back. "I was hoping we could get a little combat training in?"

"We were just headed to the arena!" Volstagg laughed.

"Perfect, let's see if you can get anymore closer to beating me." Thor laughed.

They all headed to the arena, his friends talking about their lives the past while. It was a nice distraction.

* * *

Loki was lying on his bed with his book when 3 guards came through the door carrying chains. He leaned up on his forearms, dropping the book next to him.

He cocked and eyebrow "Odin made his decision then?"

They didn't speak, one rounded the bed and hauled him out of bed roughly. He winced when the cuffs were clamped back down onto his wrists, then his Neck and ankles. He looked at one of the guards that seemed held back and his eyes darting about the room nervously.

Loki leaned a little in towards him "Don't worry I'll behave" he winked at him and smiled.

The guard stared at him wide eyed and gulped.

"Take him out" one of them behind him said.

He was pushed forward and out of the room. One thing his wouldn't get used to is the clinking of the chains. It was never supposed to be this way. He sighed, his face neutral as he walked through the hallways turning were the guards pushed him. Finally the made it to a large golden door at the end of the hallway. Hey eyed it, surprisingly he had never been into this room before. The guard opened it and he was, again pushed forward as the guard said "Move."

He glanced back at them "Eventually you are going to lose your arms" he smiled, turned back and then walked forward into the room as the guards face turned blank.

He had time to glance around the room a bit when he walked in, couple of bookshelves, wooden tables, charts, and large window, light shining through.

That was all the time he got before he was sat down in a chair, with guards on either side of him, facing the door. Odin appeared a moment later in the open doorway, his face stern and his eyes studying him. He looked more tired than usual, more sad.

He laughed at the sight which made Odin give him a glare. He walked over to him but stopped short.

"Missed me?" Loki looked up at him.

"Don't start, Loki. This is already hard enough" Odin sighed.

Loki's thoughts flashed to Thor. Does he know about the punishment? Where was he? You would think he would be here to witness the sentence... He shook his head, need to focus.

He cleared his throat "So, how is life?"

"Never have I been so disappointed, Loki" Odin slowly paced back and fourth.

He rolled his eyes and gritted his teeth " I know your here to give me my sentence so how about you skip the pity speech and get this over with?"

Odin came and stopped in front of him, glaring down at him. Loki returned the glare and shifted in his seat a little.

"Was this all some act to get my attention?" Odin snapped

Loki chuckled "No, but it was a bonus. Midgard needed a true leader, a king and I was perfect for the part. Since Asgard was stole from me I don't see why not I can go take a realm that obviously needs some help getting order back into the civilization. But it was fun to see you and Thor panic a bit" His head jerked back as he felt a sharp pain in his cheek, Odin had slapped him. He laughed and licked his lips "Well I must say I did not see that coming."

Odin still had his hand up ready to strike again. He blinked and lowered his hand, still not really sure what he had just done. He turned and became silent, fidgeting with some maps on the tables.

Loki was getting impatient. The anticipation was bothering him he's had enough of Odin, Thor, everything seem to irritate him in that moment, the guards crowding him, the window, he just wanted to lash out. He clenched his hands into fists and start to pull at his chains, he couldn't take it.

"Do something!" he screamed at Odin as the guards attempted to restrain him, pushing down on his shoulders and tightening their hold on his chains.

Odin just stood there with a look of disappointment on his face, which made Loki even more furious.

"Do something damn you!" he screamed again breaking free of the guards and body checking one of them. More piled into the room and tried to hold him down, Loki kicked and thrashed until he heard someone familiar calling his name. "Loki!"

He stopped suddenly he looked up and glared at her but softened it when he saw a petrified look on her face. He fell to his knees before her, letting his head hang down. Frigga came down to him and embraced him, crying softly and whispering words of support. He didn't hear much, he was lost in his head and was busy trying to hold the sobs in. She stroked the back of his head, Loki nestled in the crook of her neck and they just stayed there for what felt like ages.

"Frigga" Odin snapped interrupting the moment.

Frigga tightened her hug on Loki not wanting to let go, it had been too long since she had held her son. She could feel Loki shaking slightly as he buried his head more into her neck.

Frigga felt so warm, he Shivered when Odin pulled her away from him. Loki gave her once last desperate glance before he covered it with a glared at her husband. His arms where grabbed, he grunted as a knee pushed into his back. Still on his knees Odin walked towards him, Frigga looked on worriedly. Loki struggled to stand up but was held firmly down. He struggled as Odin looked down at him.

"Seventy lashes" Odin plainly said after a moment of silence.

Loki's face fell. He looked up at Frigga and she let out a big sob she had been holding.

"Odin, please-" Frigga started weakly.

"I have made my decision." Odin finalized


	6. No Statisfaction for the Wicked

**No Satisfaction for the wicked**

_"Seventy lashes..."_

_"Odin, please-"_

_Odin raised his hand to silence her._

_"I have made my decision."_

Everything was silent.

Loki's laugh broke the silence and both his 'Parents' turned to look at him. He licked his lips and stared back at them.

"Lashes? Give him a good whipping and it will be fine from then on? Sounds a bit... Old fashioned, don't you think?"

"Hmph" Odin straightened up and loomed over Loki.

"This is really just the beginning, Loki. You brought this upon yourself, I won't apologize."

Loki fumed and glared at him.

Odin Looked at the guards holding Loki "Take him to the courtyard." He commanded

Loki was hauled to his feet and practically dragged out of the room.

"Wait!" Frigga shouted, running up to her son.

She crouched in front of him and cupped his cheek. He unconsciously leaned into her hand and looked down.

"Stay strong, Loki" she whispered and placed a light kiss on his forehead. She then fled down the corridor before more tears fell.

He kept his head down as they started dragging him down the hallway again.

Despite the threat and up coming punishment, all he could do was smile as he was dragged through the halls.

* * *

Thor was hunched over, hands on his knees as he tried to get his breath back. He looked down at Fandral and Volstagg lying in the dirt attempting to get their's back as well.

"Ever heard of taking it easy?" Fandral huffed and rolled onto his back.

"That _was_ me taking it easy." Thor smiled at him and straightened. "Besides-" He walked over to them and held out his hands to both of them. "- You almost got me that time" he winked at them and laughed as they caught his hands and pulled themselves up.

There was a bit of a shoving war as they walked out of the arena and headed to the baths.

"Thor!" they heard a shout from behind them.

He turned and found his mother walking briskly towards them, visible tears in her eyes. As she reached him she wrapped her arms around him.

"Mother? What's wrong? Has something happened?" He asked impatiently when Frigga let go.

"It's Loki." she spoke, her voice wavering.

* * *

They had reached the courtyard, a crowd of people had already gathered. The yard was open, square and covered in cobblestone, with a single cherry blossom tree near the back, pedals falling and blowing in the wind. There were two large wooden poles in front of the tree, parts of them splintered.

Loki's smile had faded, his face now blank, lost in his own mind.

_Don't let them do this to you._

He was dragged through the crowd.

_Where was Thor?_

He was turned around to face the people. They had gotten more rowdy, yelling curses and threats.

_Damn him._

He grunted as he was let go, his knees hitting the cobblestone hard.

_Forget the brute, what about you?_

The guards pulled the chains on his wrists and stretched his arms up.

_Deep Breaths._

As they secured his arms another guard brought the metal gag to his face. Loki blinked and jerked his head away.

_Don't Touch Me._

The guard grasped the back of his head roughly and brought the device back to his mouth. The other guards had secured his arms to the posts, raise to be level with his shoulders.

_I won't scream._

Loki's jaw clenched and struggled to move his face away. "You don't want it? Fine. This will be more fun." the guard huffed.

_This is what you wanted, right?_

Loki glared at him until he walked back behind him.

_To get it over with?_

He felt hands grip the back of his shirt and tear it open with one strong tug.

_Don't let them have the satisfaction._

The crowd became silent and Odin stepped into the yard, tall and proud but his jaw was clenched and his eyes sad. Loki finally looked up for a second to acknowledge him with a glare.

_Come to watch your handwork, Odin?_

Odin looked behind him and nodded to one of the guards. Loki tensed when he heard shuffling behind him.

_Don't Panic._

His breathing hitched a little as he tried to listen carefully. Odin had moved to a better vantage point behind him, but he could still see him in the corner of his eye.

_Don't give in._

"Begin." was all he heard from Odin before the first strike landed.

_Damn._

Loki's eyes went wide as he felt the first lash hit his exposed back. He bit his lip to hold back a yelp that had almost escaped.

Again he felt the whip lash out, striking him again, harder.

Lash after lash hit his back. Every hit seemed to hurt more and more. His whole body was tense at this point and starting to break into a sweat.

His lip had started to bleed again under the pressure of his teeth. His eyes focusing on the cherry blossom pedals on the ground, eyes threatening to spill out tears.

He shivered when he could feel warmth running down his back.

_Blood._

His eyes began to droop.

_Don't be weak. Stay Awake._

* * *

Thor ran through the halls, skidded around corners, eyes wide.

_Please don't let it be too late._

He made it around the last corner and stopped, breathing heavily and took in the sight. "No." he breathed

He could hear the cracks of the whip echoing throughout the courtyard.

"Loki!" he yelled.


	7. No Rest for the Wicked

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title for this and last chapter comes from 'No Rest for the Wicked by Cage the Elephant'

Chapter 7: No Rest for the Wicked 

 

"Loki!"

Everything echoed in Loki's head. Time seemed to pass by slowly as he regained consciousness.

He was laying on his stomach on the cold cobblestone, his vision blurry as he attempted to open his eyes.

They focused on the petals on the ground beside him, some floating away from him as he was breathing heavily.

He could hear voices around him, yelling at each other.

"What are you doing?!"

"Do you actually think this will help? You're killing him!"

"Thor! Get out of the way!"

He could feel himself being lifted, he groaned when pain shoot through him.

"I'm Sorry, Loki."

"Thor." he managed to get out.

Thor held him tighter as he quickly carried him out of the courtyard and toward the healer room.

"Sir." the guard who had delivered the punishment urged.

Odin raised his hand. "Let them go. It is enough for now."

 

"Hang on, Loki." Thor placed him on the table, on his side as gently as he could.

Loki moaned as his adrenaline was wearing off and the pain in his back grew more intense.

Thor hushed him and stroked his hair as the healer came in and looked him over.

She called in some help and he took a step back to let them work.

Loki hissed when he felt them prodding at the wounds on his back.

Thor felt helpless, all he could do was watch as the healers attempted to get his brothers wounds clean and bandaged.

His jaw clenched as he heard Loki's hiss of pain and watching him wince and squirm away from the hands.

It took hours to get everything patched up and clean.

Thor carried Loki back to his chambers, lying him down on the soft bed.

Loki arched his back when it hit the covers.

"I'm sorry, Loki." He said quietly and helped him shift onto his side, facing away from him.

Loki's breathing had not calmed down since the healer room.

He placed a hand on his shoulder, frowning when he felt the protruding bone.

"Breathe..." he said softly, feeling Loki relax a bit and taking a deep breath in.

When Loki exhaled a small sob escaped, he bit his already damaged lip in an attempt to cut the sound off.

"It's okay, Loki. Just stay calm." Thor said as he leaned over him, looking at the pained expression on his face.

Loki tensed up again and shuts his eyes tight as he feels Thor leaning over him.

Thor feels him tense and retreats.

"Damn." he hisses and puts his face in hands.

Loki opens his eyes again, his breathing slower now.

"Don't... Don't you dare pity me anymore." He warns, voice raspy and dry.

"What am I supposed to do?" Thor looked up towards him.

"Just let me waste away in peace? I don't know. Just stop trying to help, it seems that this happened anyways despite you 'helping' me."

"I tried helping you but I was refused each time!"

Loki fell silent.

"You are being more stubborn than me." Thor smiled a little, trying to lighten the mood.

He shakes his head at his lame attempt, and clears his throat.

"Loki... What can I do?"

"I don't now, Thor. What can you do?" Loki jabbed back.

"Not helpful, Loki."

He shrugs, clenching his eyes shut when the movement pulled at his back.

Silence fills the room for a few moments

"Do you even have a sliver of compassion left?" Thor suddenly asks.

Another moment of silence.

"Loki."

"What, Thor?" he finally says. "What would you like me to say?"

Thor shrugs. "How about accepting my help?"

He heard Loki give a snort. "Seriously? How many times have we gone through this?"

"About... Five?" Thor counted on his fingers.

'Hmph' Loki acknowledged him and stirred a bit.

Thor sighed as he walked over to the other side of the bed and crawled next to him.

Loki moaned when the bed shifted, Thor being close to him wasn't helping either.

Thor turned to his and faced him. "You're getting my help no matter what. Seeing you like this... I just have to do something."

"Thor."

"I mean look at you. I should have been there"

"Thor..."

"I could have stopped him."

"Thor!" Loki yelled, wincing at the pain that came along with it.

Thor fell silent, swallowing the rest of his words and staring at his bandaged brother.

"Listen well cause this is the last time I will EVER say this."

Thor nods quickly.

"Thank you." Loki says quickly, staring at him. Half shocked what he had just said.

He wasn't as shocked as Thor, staring at his brother, he tries to find words.

Loki relaxes and closes his eyes, drifting asleep.

Thor finally gives up on words and smiles, taking one more long look at him then closing his eyes as well.

 

The door to Loki's Chamber creaks open, making him jump awake.

He was alone, as he sat up he squinted his eyes to look around the room.

Suddenly something is on top of him, heavy and cold.

Pushed back and pinned to the bed, he struggles but is unsuccessful.

"What did I say?" said a gravely voice, breath hitting against his ear.

"I found you."

Loki shook as his breathing hitched and his eyes blew wide.

He still couldn't see but he could feel everything.

"I'll teach you pain."

The monster must have stabbed him.

Searing pain erupted from his abdomen.

He tries to scream but nothing comes out.

The monster laughs and leans down towards him.

"You're Mine."

 

"Loki!"

"Loki, wake up!"

"Loki!"

Loki jumps awake, wide eyed and breathing erratic.

Pain comes back to his back again, a burning sensation from where he thought he was stabbed.

"Crap." He whispers

"What was that?" Thor asked, looking worried.

"Bad dream." Loki mumbles finding his throat still dry.

"You were thrashing like mad." Thor leans back and studies him.

"Water."

Thor nods and gets off the bed to fetch some, throwing some sheets on the floor.

He comes back with towels and bandages under his arms while he carries a bowl and a glass of water in his hands.

He hands the glass of water to him.

Loki drinks it down in big gulps and then hands it back.

"Can you flip over onto your stomach?" he asks him as he places the items on the table next to the bed.

Loki stares at him for a moment.

"Don't want to alarm you but your wounds have reopened." Thor nods to the sheets that he had tossed on the ground.

He doesn't dare look but eases him self onto his stomach grunting when he just flops back down.

Thor begins to peal the old bandages off slowly, stopping for a second each time Loki swore at him or hissed into the pillow.

"Would rather me get a healer?" Thor finally asked.

"No... I suppose better you than them..."

They are both silent as Thor finally removes the rest and begins cleaning the large gashes on Loki's back.

"What was the dream about?" Thor asks, breaking the silence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for cutting off here but at least I got this done and put a fair amount of work into it. Thank you for the Reviews, Favs, and Follows! Keep them coming! Love you all :) - Loki Code


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